What saddens me most is that I'm never as sad as I feel I should about he passing of another, just had my third grandparent go a couple months ago...

And that is what I love about Carlos he isn't flamboyant or a show off about his sexuality.  Sexuality does not define a person, their personality does.  What irks me the most is those who use their sexuality to try to explain away all of their behavior.  While this explains why I'm not so taken by Bryan or Nate, after the first impressions I can tell they learn or know when to dial it back.  No one should have to hide who they are, but not everyone needs to know either.  Time and place.  This "we must show off" is the reasons for the tensions we have, even among our own!  As there was a time when these thing weren't such an issue after rights were established because we kept things private private.  Then came social media and freedom to do as we pleased.  So that what bothers me about this given situation with Carlos the most, he is trying to be like everyone else in the face of public, he is not trying to flaunt his private life, he is not letting his sexuality dictate his actions (so yes this does indeed apply to straight people too).  All around keep those PDA simple, save more for places where permission is granted or lack of prying eyes.

And that is one of the biggest problems people and their egos, ego is not confined to one demographic or another, ego is what eats things from the inside out, to some degree I resent myself over whatever ego I may have.  Where has people's sense of humility gone???

God all of this simply because of avoidance of problems and with holding of information...  How easily it ends up twisting things... and here I feel like Ben as larger issues fly around with reckless abandon...  all because there is no longer any sort of proper boundaries.

Can't expect people to simply understand, but it would be great if they would listen, but that goes BOTH WAYS.  It does not mean it would fix things, but it would be progress towards finding a solution, even if not perfect.  Under control does not mean full control, it means to keep from getting out of hand.

Not wrong there, the whole freedom vs safety argument.  Always needs a balance, but many times those few who get abused are because of those same freedoms.  Just how many people there don't live to even regret it?  I'm all for freedoms, but we need to take it seriously.

What "Lord"? All cults have some form of religious mantra, but not all religions are cults.  So who is the one leading?  They are the one who change the tone and feeling, or even blind others.

... No not the ice cream! D:  It might be unfair but rules are rules, can argue case later... but who says anyone will believe you? or even take action? :/  Who says an issue laid to rest is ever actually at rest? *sigh* or is it just an attempt to cover and gloss things?

Routine is good, but I agree it needs to be flexible.  Can't have things too same all the time.  Oh gawd Ben XD  Well we try not to judge..., but the more we know about someone the less we stand to judge them, but don't let that blind you.  Oh you nosy kitty!

That is my dilemma... how do I address the regrets I have when I have no way to contact the recipient or know if they will even listen?  I do want to be free, but I must admit I am also one who is holding myself back and down, like my whole life.

I'd still love to be able to meet E in the VN, but given his species was multiple choice, that may be asking to much, not the first time I've asked, but I do not expect it to ever be delivered.  I think that may the biggest problem for all of us these days, running form our problems instead of solving them, and those that try getting denied, without ever getting some sense of closure and left hanging.  It can be hard to be upfront, but it is what is needed, but so often those are the ones who get ignored and feelings discarded...  Emotions are far more powerful than we realize, but it can be hard to keep them in check.  Being able to talk things out, being able to vent, being able to listen, being able to be understood, and being bale to work things out and find solutions, all something important to being something called human, and to feel like you and others exist.  And that what we all tend to suffer from, not being able to practice what we preach. *sigh*

I wouldn't want yo give up either, not without trying.  The sincerity the honesty, that is what breaks me down.  Its fine to have walls or be guarded, but don't sound proof yourself from the outside.  That outside to is all around you, there is no one direction. To live our best, but not at the expense of others.

Ugg.. essays, how may jobs actually require those?  Though you also have reports and research papers too...  It really does depend.    That is what is frustrating for me... I want it I do, but it never feels quite right when I tried.  That is another issue though, is that I've seen ace as anything between adverse to full denial, but never something solid, as what is said to be sexual keep changing depending on who you ask, or even using it as an excuse or defense mechanism to get out of something or because of abuse!... without an established boundary you have nothing but confusion that throws some people way off.  The definition and the practice do not match up, leading at times to anger and mistrust.  He has weighed the options, he knows the consequences, I VALUE honesty, it WILL hurt, but LIES hurt more.

Honestly I do feel a bit guilty for being gay, even worse was that I think I took it out on a girl, lightly, for no good reason as if I was using her as a target of my trying to deny it.  That is one of my regrets.  To forgive and forget can be hard depending on the reasons, but keeping things in perspective is of greater importance, sometimes we need other to help us see it all.  Ugg... blaming others for your own crappy choices the hell..., can't say I no Saint either no matter how hard I try.  Do be careful with "family" as any of them can disown you all the same and break their own vows.  Mmm... I like the slight tubbiness!  Body type though is only ever a perk or bonus.  That how I feel too, if that is what they want and they aren't hurting themselves, its fine.  Damn gas prices!  Aww!  To deserve something we must earn it, it cannot be so freely given.  Yet never forget you need to but blink for it all to be gone -.-.  Murr!

Oh that is a worst fear... called it!...  Ah... how easy it is for us all to just discard things, nay PEOPLE, simply because it easier to do so...

Once again it is annoying how I go off on all this, but this is just how deep it goes, how deep I go, these are not matters we can simply look the other way on time and again.  This is why I love the VN, it does not sugar coat anything, it does not hold back.  Keeping going, for its all we can do.

I've been out of the visual novels for awhile and I recently started reading again. I have forgotten how into the story you get, and how addictive just getting to the next scene is. Santa Lucia (Carlos Route) was the first one I read since I've been back and I have to say that I love it, and can't wait to read more of what this visual novel has to offer. I'm head over heels in love with this visual novel and simply can't wait for the next update. Keep up the amazing work and know that you have a forever fan. -Wolfie-

I just remembered that I have a friend with chronic nightmares and forget them always waking up tired.

Just finished the newest update to the story. I'm going to end up going crazy waiting for the next update. I just hope it goes where I think it's going to.